Chapter Eighteen: Family Breakfast:

The next morning, I got up in my childhood room. It felt too weird to be in here. Not much had changed in here. I still had that old Green Day poster on the wall. It looked like it was ready to fall off. I’ve been meaning to press it back up. Let’s see, what is today? Saturday? Maybe? I swung my legs out of bed. I guess I could just spend all the in the house. I shook my head. I can’t do that anymore. I’m too old for that sort of thing. Oh that’s right, I don’t have a job anymore. I started to laugh, but then I got sad.

I finally made it down stairs. Mom and my sisters were already at the table. They looked up and saw me in the doorway.

“Good morning!” Mom said.

“Morning,” I mumbled. I walked over to the table and sat down. I could smell pancakes.

“What’s for breakfast?” I asked. Mom had a huge smile on her face.

“Chocolate chip pancakes,” she said. I lifted my head as my eyes widened.

“Are you serious?” I asked.

“Uh-huh!” she said. I looked over at Kim and Mallory. They had smiles on their faces. My eyes shifted back and forward.

“Is there a special occasion?” I asked.

“No,” mom said. She served us our plates. Mom joined us at the table.

“Thank you,” we all said. My sisters picked up their forks. I stared down at my plate. When was the last time I had pancakes? Ones not from a restaurant? It’s been too long. I shook my head.

“Is something wrong, dear?” Mom asked. I quickly looked up.

“Oh. Nothing,” I said. I picked up my fork and knife and cut into my pancakes. One bite took me back to my childhood.

“These are good,” I said. I happily began eating. Mallory and Kim were watching me. Somehow, I was okay with that.

“What are you all planning to do today?” Mom asked.

“I’m going back to sleep,” Mallory said. Mom frowned.

“But you just got up,” she said. My sister shrugged as she pulled out her phone.

“I don’t know,” Kim said.

“Me neither,” I said. Mom furrowed her brow, frowning.

“Hm…” she said. I raised my eyebrow.

“Mom…” I said. She shrugged her shoulders.

“Never mind,” mom said.

“What?” I asked. I didn’t like where this could be going. Come on, what are you up now? I furrowed my brow and frowned.

“Is there anything that you need?” I asked. Mom sat back in shock.

“Me?” she asked. I lowered my fork.

“Come on, mom,” I said. “What do you need? I’ll help you today if you have.”

“No, you don’t have to,” she said. I rolled my eyes. I hate this game that she tries to play when she wants something from us. I just wasn’t in the mood.

“Come on, spit it out,” I said. “What do you need today?” Mom shrugged as if I twisted her arm.

“Alight,” she said. “I just need someone to take me to the farmer’s market,” she said. I took another bite of my pancakes. I knew it.

“What time?” I asked.

“Eleven,” Mom said with a sheepish tone in her voice. I rolled my eyes.

“Fine,” I said. She perked up with a big smile on her face.

“Thank you, I love you so much,” Mom said. I didn’t say anything as I took another bite. In that moment, I realized something. I needed to stop feeling sorry for myself and Mom was trying in her own clumsy way to do that. Sure, I didn’t know what I was doing but I needed to cut my losses. My former students and colleagues were still going to contact me, but I couldn’t let that get me down. I was just going to live out this summer until I came up with a new plan. I must have been smiling as I ate because Mallory gave me a strange look.

“What’s with you?” she asked. I shook my head.

“Oh nothing,” I said. Mallory wrinkled her nose.

“You’re weird,” she said. I just sat back in my chair and took another bite of my pancakes. My give a damn was officially off for the rest of the summer.