Chapter Thirty-Eight: Spoony’s Grand Master Plan:

“Picture the scene,” Spoony said. “You are in your seventies. You are living on your own and you are feeling rather lonely.” I frowned.

“Where are you going with this?” I asked. He held up his hand.

“You are all alone,” he said. “So what do you do?” I blinked.

“Uh…” I said.

“Give us a call!” Spoony shouted. He threw back his head, laughing. I gave him a strange look.

“Huh?” I asked. He turned to me, grinning.

“It’s a calling service,” he said. “We just call and talk to the elderly.” He didn’t wait for me to respond.

“Picture it!” he said. Spoony put his arm around my shoulders.

“Calls from all over the country,” he said. “Alabama, Texas, California, Maine, North Carolina, and everywhere in between. Hell we could even go to Canada with this.”

“I don’t think I can go there,” I said.

“Relax, man!” he said. “One of my boys has the West and Canada covered.” I slipped out of his grasp.

“How is this even going to work?” I asked. Spoony pointed his thumb into his chest.

“Leave it to me!” he said. I frowned. I should’ve known it was going to come to this. He’ll probably change his mind in a way. I was counting that in fact.

“Do you have enough money to pull this off?” I asked. I turned back to my house. Was it too late to go back inside now? He looked at me with a catlike smirk.

“I might know some people,” he said. My face dropped.

“Spoony…” I said.

“Relax, relax,” he said. “It’s nothing illegal.” That’s not to reassuring. I turned and walked up to the house. Spoony put his hand on my shoulder.

“Come on, man,” he said. “With you on my side, we can do everything!” I rolled my eyes and shoved off.

“At least think about it!” Spoony yelled after me. I waved him off as I walked back into the house. No sooner had I closed the door behind me, my phone buzzed. What now?

“You’re back,” I heard someone say. I looked up to see Karen staring at me. I tilted my head.

“You’re still here,” I said. My phone buzzed again.

“You going to get that?” she asked. I turned and walked out of the house. To the surprise of no one, Spoony was standing outside.

“Well?” he asked.

“Tell me what I need to do,” I said. Spoony was smiling like the Mad Hatter.

“Come with me and you shall see,” he said. He held out his hand to me. I rolled my eyes and sighed. Too late to back out of this now. This idea sounded stupid, but I didn’t feel like dealing with my cousins. I took him by the hand and we walked down to the street.