Chapter Nine: Drowning:

The water felt cold against my skin. My mother just abandoned me to this shack in the middle of the woods. Mama left me with Mama Betty. Now, I sat alone in a porcelain tub in cold water. I had my knees drawn to my chest. I shivered. I bit down on my thumb.

What was I going to do now? My family abandoned me. They wouldn’t talk to me at dinner. I never thought that it would turn out like this. How did they find out what I did? I thought I kept it to myself. I shut my eyes and shook my head. I couldn’t get their cold looks out of my head. Even my younger siblings wouldn’t talk to me. Mama and Papa kept their eyes on me. I didn’t want to know what they were planning to do with me. I tried to act like everything was normal, but deep down I knew. I couldn’t even bring myself to finish my dinner. I just stared at my plate toward the end of dinner. What was going to happen to me?

Last night was just painful. Mama Betty dragged me into her shack. I didn’t fight back as she pulled me inside. She didn’t say a word at first. We sat down at her wooden table in her kitchen. Mama Betty asked me one question.

“Do you have a baby in your belly?” she asked. I stared at her.

“What?” I asked.

“Are you with child?” that old hag asked. I shook my head.

“I… I… I don’t know,” I said. Mama Betty snorted at me.

“Get up,” she said. I didn’t have a choice. I rose to my feet. Turned out, she had different ways of telling how girls were pregnant. I paused when she opened the pantry door. Wait… It all started to sink in. I thought back to that beautiful boy I gave my virginity to all those weeks ago. I didn’t even know what his name was. I could barely remember his face anymore.

Aunt Betty turned to me with a pregnancy test in her hand. My stomach dropped as it became more real to me. I prayed that it wouldn’t come to this. Mama Betty didn’t say anything as she shoved the pregnancy test box.

“Read the directions on the box,” she said. “Bathroom is down the hall to your left.”

 “Yes… ma’am…” I said in a quiet voice. I turned and walked in the direction she told me.

Five minutes later, the test came back positive. I couldn’t pretend anymore. That beautiful boy got me pregnant. When I walked out of the bathroom, Mama Betty was standing outside, waiting. I felt so small as I held up the test. She shook her head.

“It’s just as I thought,” she said. I lowered my head.

“What happens now?” I asked. I didn’t have to look up to see that she too was disappointed in me. Mama Betty patted me on the head.

“You are going to have to listen to me very carefully,” she said in a low voice. Her tone made me shiver.

I let my head drop under the water and screamed. “I hate them all!” Why did Mama do this to me? I didn’t know what I was going to do. I came up in time to hear a knock on the bathroom door.

“Are you finished in there?” Mama Betty asked. “We still need to talk.” My teeth were chattering as I tried to talk.

“Yes… Ma’am…” I forced out of my mouth. I waited to hear her walking away from the thin wooden door. I didn’t dare to move in that tub of cold water. I wished that I could just sink down and disappear. It would’ve been better than what I would live about this town in the coming days.