Little Leaks:

That boy messed up my head since then. I had fallen for him, but I wouldn�t admit it at the time. I was still too proud and ignorant at the time. Jim knew that, but he didn�t seem to know how to quit. I was surprised to find that rather annoying and pretty charming about him. Your grandfather was just crazy like that! Maybe that�s why I fell in love with him in the end. He was just that charming rascal! I love and hate him for that!

This became evident three weeks into the new semester. I just couldn�t take it anymore. Jim was just everywhere. If it wasn�t at school, I saw him in the drug store, library, on the streets, in the mall, and in the park. I began to think he was stalking me. I just couldn�t understand that boy at all! I tried to ignore him at first. But then, he started to show up more and more. It all drove me mad! I just couldn�t take it anymore.

So one day at my locker, I saw him coming my way. I was just so angry when I saw him. I wanted to smack him so badly. He had messed with me head so badly by that point. I couldn�t take it anymore. I just had to put a stop to this before it got out of hand. So, I turned to him and waited for him to approach. He saw me and smiled. I gritted my teeth. That smile was so annoying! Your grandfather made it over to me. I didn�t notice until too late.

�Hey baby!� Jim greeted me, smoothly. I only sneered at him. He noticed my face.

�Why you so pissy, Star?� he asked.

�Starlette!� I snapped. �My name is Starlette! Only my friends can call me that!�

�And what am I to you?� he asked me. I glared at him as if he was crazy.

�No one!� I hissed.

�Anyway,� he said. �Seriously, what�s the matter with you, girl?� I looked at him really coldly.

�You!� I snapped. Jim looked at me slightly hurt.

�Ah, why is that?� he asked.

�Let�s see!� I began. �You cocky attitude, your voice, your smart-mouth comments, your face, your perverted views, just� you!� I was so busy ranting that I didn�t notice the hungry look in his eyes. I didn�t see it until too late. I looked at him oddly when I did.

�Jim?� I asked. �Hello? Are you listening to me? Jim? Jim?� Then suddenly, your grandfather grabbed me by the waist and kissed me on the lips hard. That shocked me to my very core. I wanted to hit him off of me, but my body wouldn�t move. My head was so confused. I was supposed to hate this; I was supposed to hate him! But� he just made it all confusing. I hated him, but yet� he was wearing me down, with love no less. In the end, I just gave up and let him kiss me again.

When he pulled away, I was more confused than ever. I stared at him so.

�Why?� was all I could ask. Jim just looked at me.

�Why what?� he asked. I blinked at him.

�Why did you kiss me?� I asked. �Why? Why are you always there? Why are you so interested in me? Why? Just why?� Jim lightly took me by the cheeks. He gently shushed me. I stared at him still. Your grandfather gave me a kind smile.

�You want to know that badly?� he asked. I nodded at him once. Jim leaned in close to my ear.

�Come out to the party tonight,� he whispered. �And I will tell you everything you want to know. Okay?� I didn�t respond. He lightly let go of my cheeks. I stared on at him still. Jim gave me a wild grin.

�Well then, see you in class, Star!� he finished up. �And maybe tonight!� Then, that old dog walked away grinning. I stared at his back at a loss for words. Once again, your grandfather confused me so much. I was more lost than when I first talked to him that morning. I didn�t even bother to correct him with my name again.

1983