Irises

My mother�s been much calmer lately. No more looks of fear, no nightmares, not even ikebana. She sat in the living room and watched the TV. Despite the appeal, I found it rather creepy. She looked like an animated corpse for this whole summer. Her flowers had more life in them than she does. I was tempted to check and see if she still had a pulse in front of her TV. She sat in her room and stared at the door all day. Now, I�m worried. What kind of drugs did the doctor give her? I couldn�t ask him to stop giving them to her. She needed them or else her terrors will start again. I sighed as I lay on my futon.

I sat up and left my room. My feet heavily wandered down to our living room. She left the TV on again. I looked and saw the news. The Americans were still in our beloved Japan. Things have felt tense sense September of last year. I�ve heard many people in town complaining about how much they don�t like it. If one looked at my neighborhood, they couldn�t tell if this was the 1800s or post-WWII except for the power lines above the houses. Everything in this neighborhood felt so stiff like my Mother�s dried irises. Nothing ever really changed around here. I had the feeling that the rest of the country is going to leave this place behind and forget all about it. I didn�t know. It felt like the inevitable.

I shook my head as if to push such thoughts out of my mind. It was summer and I�m thinking depressing thoughts? That�s just not right. I noticed my Mother�s neglected irises on the coffee table. I always wondered why she liked irises so much. I had many guesses. My best one was that my father had given them to her in their younger days. I couldn�t really confirm that yet until I ask her. Heh, I doubt I would ever get an answer out of her anyway, especially not in the state that she�s in right now. Personally, I think I liked her lost in her own world than acting like a zombie. When will she ever get back to �normal?� I pushed her out of my head and tried to think about something else.

Juriko appeared in my head. I�ve seen her flirting around with some American soldiers in town lately. I�m was exactly sure what her motives are for doing that. Haruka didn�t hesitate to tell me.

�She�s just trying to use them to get out of this crappy place,� she grumbled to me days before school started again. Somehow, I couldn�t really blame Juriko. She wanted to get out of here and see what�s out there in the world. Haruka and I wanted the same thing too, but how do we accomplish that? How do we even begin to attempt such a plan? We didn�t have much money and we didn�t really know anybody outside of Nara. It seemed to be all in vain in the end. I sighed as I fell back onto my couch. It was too depressing for me in this house. I needed to get out more.