Susan
-Susan-
I’ve fucked up.
I didn’t think my life could get any worse. I’m about to die and now I’ve been
caught.
Number Five.
It’s burned into
my back. I hate it! I don’t want to die. I used to be normal, you know? I had a
good life. Loving parents, amazing friends, a beautiful house, straight A’s, and
great looks. That’s not me bragging. It’s just hot it was. But then I got cursed
last spring.
I don’t know. I
guess I stopped caring. Why should I? I’m going to die anyway. It’s not going to
die anyway. It’s not going to make a difference. Still, what was I going to do?
I might as well live it up, right? So, I decided to get a boyfriend.
This all started
at the beginning of the school year. I had a History of Language class.
(Cliched, I know.) I was going through the motions at the time. I used to look
forward to this class. But now, what was the point? I would just get through
this in die.
That’s when I
saw him.
I don’t want to
out my boyfriend for this. So, I’m going to call him Sensei. And yes. He is the
professor. We’ve been dating for seven months now. He is so cool. When I first
saw him, I thought I saw an angel. The girls liked him. The guys wanted to be
him. One look at him and you will get it.
At first, I
wasn’t sure if I should pursue him or not. He was the professor. I’m supposed to
be the student. It wouldn’t be right.
But I was going
to die anyway.
I was the one
who approached him. It was after class in April. Sensei sat at his desk, grading
papers. Honestly, I didn’t have a plan. I just walked up to his desk. I froze
when he looked up.
“Yes?” Sensei
asked. I stood for a moment. He cocked his head to the side.
“Can I help
you?” he asked. I really was doing this, wasn’t I? I was about to jump off the
ledge in my mind.
“I like you!” I
blurted out. There was no tact. It just came out. Well, it was out there.
“I’m sorry?”
Sensei asked.
“I like you,” I
said again. “I mean really like you.” I should’ve quit there. Only…
“You like me?”
he asked. I nodded. He set down his pen. This was it. Too late to turn back now.
Sensei chuckled to himself. He looked up, smiling. My heart fluttered against my
chest. My cheeks turned red. It felt like a J-Drama.
By the end of
April, we were dating. Sensei made me feel like a queen. I worked hard in his
class. No, I didn’t get special treatment. It wouldn’t be fair to my classmates.
Sensei and I would meet up after the school day. I would get into his car.
Usually, we meet up at the local café to “study”. He was the one who took me to
dinner. Sometimes, Sensei and I would get a hotel room. He only stayed at my
apartment once. We never went back to his place. I never asked why. My friends
knew I had a boyfriend. Naturally, they had their questions.
“What is he
like?”
“What’s his
name?”
“Do we know
him?”
“Who is he?”
I couldn’t
answer yet. I wasn’t ashamed of him. This secret was for me. Sensei didn’t ask
me to keep quiet. It was just an understanding. This was our secret. Everything
was going great. However, I would be drawn back to reality. You see, there was a
problem in our relationship. A big one. Sensei is married.
And I just met his wife.