Chapter Eleven: Out on the Open Water:

Night ushered itself in pretty soon. I lied back onto the deck, looking up at the stars. So annoying this is turning out to be. I just wanted a little getaway all by myself, but Sappoto-san just had to come along and complicate things. At least now, I get five seconds to myself in silence.

�Miho-chan,� I heard someone whimper. *Plus-cross on my head* So much for that hope�

�What?� I asked through gritted teeth.

�I can�t sleep,� she whimpered.

�Why not?� I asked. I listened as footsteps shuffled over to my head. I felt her breath on my forehead.

�I keep thinking�� she mumbled.

�What?� I asked. She didn�t speak at first. I tried not to be a bitch for the moment. Anything to get rid of her for some silence. She kept stalling with her words. I feel my patience burning away.

�Spit it out,� I said. �What were you thinking about?�

�My daughter,� she said at last. I sat up with a puzzled look on my face. Sappoto-san looked at me with a trembling lower lip.

�Huh?� I asked. She sat down on her knees before me.

�I didn�t realize it until three months,� Sappoto-san whimpered. �My little girl had hearing problems.� Her brown eyes welled up with big tears. �All of that time, I hit her out of frustration at why she didn�t obey me. It turned out that she couldn�t hear me to begin with.� Tears rolled down her cheeks.

�Oh,� she whimpered. �I am a bad person.� My annoyance washed into sympathy. I patted her on the back.

�There, there,� I whispered. �That doesn�t make you a bad mother. You just didn�t know any better.�

�But what if she grows up to hate me?� she wailed.

�Do think like that,� I said. �How old is your daughter?�

�Seven,� Sappoto-san whimpered.

�Ah, there�s still some time to fix the bridges,� I said. She gave me a little pout.

�You think so?� she asked. I nodded as if trying to sell her a lie.

�Yeah,� I said. �Just give it some time, okay?� Sappoto-san tried to make herself smile through her tears as she nodded.

�Alright,� she whispered. The big sap ended up sleeping next to me on the deck. I shook my head to myself as I looked up at the sky. What else could I do? She would probably come back crying to me if I sent her to the beds.

But, I can�t blame her for being lonely. I mean, I missed Andi at that moment as well. I haven�t smelt her hair for days now. Even though I share the bed with Sappoto-san, I still feel pretty lonely at nights. I don�t think I could call her out on the water like this. Can I even get bars out on the ocean? I know it would cost me to make calls long distance in other countries.

I shut my eyes tightly. What the hell? I�m escaping right now, not thinking about reality. Right, think about something else. I opened my eyes to the stars in the sky. Looks beautiful tonight. The sounds of the ocean and calmness around us worked like a lullaby. But yet, I tried to fight to stay awake. I don�t want to go to sleep. However, I�m fighting a losing battle here. I ended up shutting my eyes and dozing off. Sappoto-san and I look like two little children sound asleep on a boat sailing further out into sea. God, I can�t stand that woman at times like these.