Chapter Forty: Gentle in Love:

-Wallace-

There are many things I don’t understand in life. Love was one of those things. I’ve always had eyes for Julia. That hasn’t changed, kind of. Let me explain. I still have feelings for her, but she’s different now. I don’t know how to deal with it. I thought that I could, but now I’m not so sure. I know that I still love her. I’m not sure how she feels about me, though. She does seem interested in me.

She isn’t the only one either.

I don’t know what it is. I’ve had many eyes on me lately. I don’t know what did to get that. I’m not popular at all. I’m not into sport either. I’m just… me. When I first came here, it was to follow Julia. I had decent enough grades to do it. Now, I’m not so sure of my motives anymore. It’s too early to drop out now. I at least have to finish a semester. The classes aren’t hard either though. It’s just…

“Why did you come to this school in the first place?” my professor asked. I looked up at the question.

“Huh?” I asked. She had a curious look on her face.

“You don’t spark me as the artistic type,” Professor Liz said. “So, why here? Go on, you can tell me.” I shifted my eyes away from her.

“Hm?” she asked. I couldn’t meet her eyes.

“Hm…” my professor said.

“What?” I asked. I caught a glimpse of her smirking at me. Her face reminded me of a cat. What was she thinking?

“It’s because of a girl, isn’t it?” Professor Liz asked. My face turned bright red.

“I knew it,” she said.

“I didn’t say that,” I said. I looked up to see her shaking her head.

“No didn’t need to,” the professor said. “Your body language told me.” She chuckled to herself.

“Reminds me of myself,” my professor said. “I fell in love with a guy while I was in high school. I followed him to Princeton for college. I barely made it in. I had a good time up there, but it wasn’t meant to be with that guy I followed. He ended up dating someone else.”

“Oh,” I said. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Don’t be,” she said, shrugging. “It was what it was. Probably wouldn’t have worked out anyway. We just wanted different things.” I shook my head at her.

“I don’t get it,” I said.

“Get what?” she asked, narrowing her eyes.

“Why are you telling me this?” I asked. Professor Liz leaned back in her chair.

“I don’t know,” she said. “Maybe because it would be lame if you wasted your college years chasing after some girl that might not be worth it after all.” My professor looked over at the window on the other side of her office.

“Is there anything else you wanted to talk about?” she asked.

“No,” I said. “I’m good.” I stood up from the chair.

“Feel free to stop by if want to talk to me again,” my professor said.

“Sure,” I said. I walked out of her office with my hands in my pockets. I could feel her eyes on my back. Was she smiling at me? I didn’t really want to know. I made it out to the hall and walked on to rehearsal.

I still don’t know what I am doing. Talking to Professor Liz didn’t really help either. She did say something that made sense. I probably shouldn’t have picked my school based on my crush. It was too late to turn back now. I had to at least see the semester through. I had to at least see the play through. After that, I didn’t know what I was doing.